Saturday, July 01, 2006

Oh what the heck...The Dreaded List

1. I'm named after my father. Which means, I'm a Junior.

2. Relatives call me Jonjon.

3. Since moving to the US, a lot of people couldn't pronounce my name right. To make it easier for them and to my ears, I ask them to call me Jake instead.

4. Even as a little boy, I was cognizant of the fact that my attraction to boys/men made me different.

5. I went into the closet when in Kindergarten, an aunt asked me who was my 'crush' in my class. Upon explaining to me what it meant, with much glee, I mentioned a boys name. Met with tsk(s), head shakes, and some nervous laughter then further told me that it should be of the opposite sex. Absolutely confused and aware that something was awry, I blurted out the name of the smartest girl in class.

6. I had the faintest recollection of being 'played' with by an older male, a very distant relative. And remembering the pleasures instead of shame.

7. First time I got drunk was when I was 7 years old. Courtesy of some tomboyish girl whose family was visiting.

8. I went to Catholic school from k-2nd grade. Was awarded 'Most Courteous' for 2 years.

9. Always ate my veggies.

10. Learned how to cook by watching my grandma and other female relatives. (Except my mother, who can not cook for shit!)

11. Ate ketchup sandwiches when I was little.

12. After watching hot coal walkers on TV, I figured I could do it. Ended up burning both my feet.

13. Was not really that close to my dad growing up. But the thing I will remember most of him was how he had to carry me the whole time I was not able to walk because of #12.

14. My mom constantly remind me of how the back of my ears resembles that of my dad.

15. I have 3 brothers. 1 older, 2 younger.

16. My mom thought I was going to be a girl. Was going to name me Leonora June.

17. I have the habit of taking pictures but not developing them for quite some time. (years even)

18. Joined the Army right out of high school.

19. I didn't have any sexual thoughts the whole time I was in Basic Training. Was too focused on being a perfect Soldier.

20. Was stationed in Schweinefurt, Germany for 2 years. Conn Barracks.

21. Was deployed to Bosnia for 11 months.

22. Spent New Years Eve of 1996 in a bus full of soldiers at the Austria-Hungary border.

23. Had my first voluntary homosexual experience with another soldier. He was my best friend at the time.

24. Had my heart broken for the first time by the same guy when he told me he had a boyfriend back at home, and that it--me--was just for fun.

25. One of my sergeant's youngest son caught me during my first homosexual experience, he woke up from a bad dream looking for his mommy.

26. It was in their living room.

27. I have a dog. Her name is Miss Chess or MC.

28. I came out to my parents the same year Matthew Sheppard died. I was whoring around in Myrtle Beach, South Carolina that I didn't even hear about it until my mom mentioned the fact.

29. Upon hearing me state that I was gay, my dad told me to go talk to a priest.

30. My older brother cried when I told him.

31. Served in the Army for 5 years.

32. Got out in 1999.

33. I tried to commit suicide a week before my 22nd birthday. It was because of a guy.

34. His name is Scott. I still remember the first time we kissed. On his 21st birthday. Took him to his first gay bar, after one of my friends slipped and outed me. He is/was straight.

35. Have only been with three relationships. The longest last 6 months. He was 23 years my senior (nope, he was not a sugar daddy). He cheated on me with a future co-worker.

36. Once while drunk, I blurted out; "Even if I am gay, I would eat Shania Twain's pussy!"

37. For a while, my nickname was STP.

38. My blog is named after a Duncan Sheik song. "Mr. Chess".

39. When I was 5, I kissed a sleeping cousin on the lips. Last year, he told my older brother that he was awake the whole time.

40. I got my tongue pierced 2 months ago.

41. Sometimes I like to lay in bed with no lights on and listen to Linda Ronstadt sing Someone To Watch Over Me.

42. First time I had anal sex I thought I was doing it wrong. It felt like I was about to take #2.

43. I was so nervous the first time I went into a gay bar. Literally a few miles outside of Fort Bragg. Kept guzzling down hard alcohol and ended up in the back seat of a moving car giving someone a blowjob. Felt like trash the next day, left and never called him back.

44. I've met and took guys back to my barracks to have sex.

45. One time while rimming a guy, I found tp on my tongue. Now, I make sure they have just recently taken a shower or do the finger swipe before even attempting.

46. Best BJ I received was from a guy who looked like George Costanza. He lives in Virginia.

47. I love the feel of freshly shaven head.

48. Nothing gets me harder than a great kiss.

49. Worst kiss I've ever experienced was when the guy practically slobbered all over my nose.

50. Ponytails on guys are such turn-offs.

51. I once had foreplay (kissing, oral, etc.) with a guy but I refused to go further. Something felt wrong. I later found out he was positive. He never told me. I was sweating bullets the day I got my results back.

52. I am negative.

53. I've always trusted my instincts since then.

54. Once I purposely misled someone to have sex with his bestfriend in front of me with the thought that he would do it with me next. I never did. Somedays I wished I had.

55. I have been involved with 2 threesomes.

56. I like the smell of rubbing alcohol.

57. I love to cook. I cook in large quantities.

58. If time allows, I would be inside a grocery store for hours. I like to take my time examining things I would buy to cook.

59. I have a constant fear of growing old alone.

60. I am stubborn.

61. The longest time I haven't had sex is 5 years.

62. Got laid this past January. My first fellow Filipino.

63. When I was 8 or 9, my older brother and I would rent porno (this was in the Philippines) and watch it behind closed doors. He got caught one day. As punishment, my mom and 2 aunts watched it with him.

64. I've seen people die in front of me. They were jumping off a building during an earthquake back in 1989.

65. My family moved to Glendive, Montana in 1991. 2 years later, we moved to Lodi, California where my parents and 2 younger brothers still live.

66. I now reside in Stockton, California (20 miles from my parents') and my older brother in Minnesota.

67. I want to move to San Francisco next. Maybe by the end of the year.

68. I have the habit of agreeing to go to several functions in the same day.

69. I love to dance.

70. Popped my right knee out twice while dancing.

71. I like to sleep naked but don't.

72. I drink 5 espresso shots over ice with 2 equals.

73. I work too much.

74. I daydream too much.

75. I'm very loyal to my friends.

76. I sing karaoke only when I have alcohol in my system (don't we all?)

77. And I was born in 1977.