Friday, September 02, 2005

Thursday, September 01, 2005

To Cupid: "Throw Me A Bone, Will Ya!"

Sigh, It's been such a long time since I've kissed a man. I mean, really really KISS A MAN. The initial hesitation; wondering what kind of kiss the other prefer. Should I be rough? Soft, gentle on the lips? Does he like it when I suck on his tongue? Would he like it if I stick my tongue inside his mouth and go exploring? Nibbles? Wet or dry? Quiet? Or should I start making lapping noises? I actually dated someone who loved it when I make wet smacking noises whenever I kissed him, he said it turned him on. I thought, "Why not?"

There were only a few guys that I've locked lips with and thought 'blah'. One guy kissed as if he was chewing cud. Another pressed his lips so hard against mine that I swore I tasted blood. And once I thought I was kissing a dog named Charles, he was slobbering so much that to save the night, I had to feign interest and have him blow me instead. Which turned out to be a blessing in disguise. Good Charlie, good boy!

I'm not asking for much. Not even sex. Just to remember how a kiss from a man feels. How it would excite me, give me a sense of euphoria and contentment. How it would give me an instant smile and make everything better. The faint smell of aftershave/cologne. The stubble that rubs against my face. The tender side. The rough I-Wanna-Fuck-You-Now way of kissing. The I-Love-You moment.